Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize