hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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