sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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