WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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