Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
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