She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
