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• (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.

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• (815): View more from Illinois

  Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.

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  Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (954): View more from Florida

  tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?

  (1-954): View more from Florida

  Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.

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• (336): View more from North Carolina

  Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.

  (850): View more from Florida

  This has already gotten way out of hand

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or

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• (514): View more from Quebec

  I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.

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• 

  19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (540): View more from Virginia

  Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.

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• (843): View more from South Carolina

  the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.

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• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(

  (1-978): View more from Massachusetts

  I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Or a taco

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• (307): View more from Wyoming

  You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.

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• (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks

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