Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize
