There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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