he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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