im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I intend to get homeless drunk
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
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