I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
