sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
