I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
Randomize
