Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
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