I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
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