Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
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