it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Randomize