dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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