..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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