The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
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