I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Randomize
