She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize