He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
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