the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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