u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
Randomize
