Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
