i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
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