We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
