Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms