I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
Randomize
