we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
why do cheetos always look like penises
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
Randomize
