Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Randomize
