she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize