I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize