Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
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