i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Randomize
