I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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