sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
Randomize
