PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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