Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
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