After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
Randomize
