What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
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