Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
Randomize
