don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize