Apparently you make a good broom.
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Randomize
