She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize