chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
