So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
I think I am morally bankrupt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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