Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
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