i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
