You're so nebulous sometimes
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
