I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
